I know your secret. Don’t try to hide it from me. Don’t you worry now because your secret is safe with me. I know the real reason you are running on empty is that you haven’t been giving yourself routine self-care.
Heck, if you’re anything like me, you’re probably not even sure what that really means for you. And the self-care I’m talking about here is not those once in a while things you do to perk yourself up.
I’m talking about consistent and routine self-care that tends to all facets of your needs and being.
Do you ever feel like you are everything to all people?
Does it feel like in the struggle to keep everything together, you lost yourself and your way?
Let’s face it, most modern women hold a multitude of jobs.
- Employees/ Professionals or SAHM
- Household CEO’s and managers.
- The chauffeur
- The cook
- The cleaner
- The shopper
- The social event coordinator
- The financial planner
- The interior decorator…
Should I keep going?
I didn’t think so.
The modern mom works the equalivalent of 2.5 full time jobs
Did you know that? That’s 100 hours of work in a week.
Add to that a weekly commute of 15 hours (1.5 hours each way for 5 days a week)
That brings us up to 115 hours.
She also needs sleep, so let’s calculate healthy sleep and add 8 hours a night for 7 nights. That’s an addditonal 56 hours added to the week. Bringing us to a total of 171 hours.
There are only so many hours in a week
Do you know how many hours there are in a week?
Yup 168 hours in a week.
If we are actually getting the required 8 hours of sleep a night that we need, we are running on a time deficit. A weekly time deficit of 3 hours to be exact.
And that excludes all the extracurricular activites.
The weekly schedule and tasks we are talking about here, are just the basics. The cleaning, the laundry, the cooking. We are not talking about nurturing self-care and nourishing your soul activities.
Don’t you want more from your life?
Don’t you dream of living your life with joy and passion?
Running on empty
In the struggle to keep up with life, it feels like there is no time for you.
It’s no wonder you are running on empty.
You’re not even running on empty,
YOU ARE BANKRUPT.
Your tank is completely empty.
There is not an ounce left for anything extra, let alone the time to care for yourself.
When I mention self-care, I don’t mean those once in a while things you do to perk yourself up; things like getting a massage or a pedicure or manicure. Although these are definitely self-care activities if done routinely.
Self-care is not about depleting yourself and then trying to “catch up”
What I’m talking about here is REAL self-care.
Regular and consistent things you do for yourself that fill up your tank.
I know what you’re thinking.
“But there’s no time for me to take care of myself”
Admit it , that’s what you thought isn’t it?
Making ourselves a priority
We think we don’t have time for these self-care activities because we don’t make ourselves a priority.
Let me tell you this dear friend.
YOU ARE IMPORTANT
YOU ARE ENOUGH
YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO IT ALL
YOU CAN SET YOUR PRIORITIES, BOUNDARIES AND LIMITS SO YOU CAN GET WHAT YOU NEED.
The world, your kids, your family and your household will not fall apart. If it feels like your life is chaotic, like mine did, it is precisely because you are not making yourself a priority.
We need to be our own best advocates.
“Oh but that’s way too selfish” you say.
“A good mother sacrifices herself for her children”
***loud gameshow buzzer sound****
YOU ARE WRONG DEAR MAMA.
Self-care is not selfish, it is vital
Real routine self-care is the single best thing you can do for yourself and your family.
Let me repeat, REAL ROUTINE SELF-CARE is the SINGLE BEST thing you can do FOR YOURSELF and YOUR FAMILY.
Don’t believe me? Consider this. If your car is out of gas and you don’t maintain it properly or regularly it won’t work anymore. It will stop working and it won’t be able to take you where you need to go. Done deal.
Your body and your life are the same.
You need to be in good working order.
To be in good working order you need to know where you are and what self-care
Once you know what’s missing, then you can create your own internal map.
Your map along with action, will get you to where you want to go.
And as you begin to take good self-care, you will see that your life may not feel so chaotic anymore.
You will be more efficient.
You will be more productive.
You will have a better relationship with your partner.
You will have a better relationship with your kids.
Your life and your home will be more organized.
And you will start creating the life of your dreams.
We have been doing this all
backwardsdear Mama. We can’t be all things to all people without taking care of ourselves first.
I tell you all this dear friend out of love and experience. I know because I hit rock bottom. My life felt like complete and utter chaos and nothing seemed to be working.
I was physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually bankrupt.
I had nothing left to give anyone or anything.
This brought me into a dark place where I just fantasized of a magical LIFE RESET button.
But of course, there is no such thing.
I had to take responsibility for my life. I had to make the changes necessary to create my own happy life.
What I had failed to learn was that I NEEDED to take good care of myself on a daily, weekly, monthly and yearly basis.
I was barely doing the basics. I mean it. Depression and burnout are funny things. I was so burnt out. Even brushing my teeth and showering everyday was a challenge. I was too exhausted and I didn’t have the energy.
I didn’t have the energy because I didn’t see myself as important.
But everything else in my life was an extension of me and how well I was able to care for myself.
Roadmap back to self
How was I supposed to take good self-care if I didn’t even know what I wanted or needed? I set out to search for all the areas in my life that needed self-care :
I had to take a self-care inventory. This was my GPS and my map to making a self-care plan. A self-care plan that would launch me into my happy home and happy life. (I will be adding a free printable soon, you can take your own self-care inventory)
I know it works because as I began to take good self-care, my life began to feel less chaotic. My relationship with my partner and my children improved, I became more organized and productive. In essence, my life began to transform. I began to climb out of the chaos of my life.
This is how this website was born. So come on this journey with me dear friend. I don’t have all the answers, but I know how you feel. I’m figuring it out as I go along.
I will share with you my trials and tribulations. I will teach you what I have tried that has worked.
I can share all this with you. . I can provide you with inspiration and insight. I can give you tips, tricks and tools,
But you are the one that is going to have to do the work.
I can’t do it for you. If you want to change you need to commit to yourself. If you don’t already have one, I suggest you go out and get yourself a journal. I will have free resources, but I don’t want to limit how much of yourself you explore by how much space I provide.
Your journal will help you reflect on those things you need to work on to improve your life.
You’ve got this, and YOU CAN DO THIS!
I would love to hear about your journey and your struggles so let me know how I can help you by leaving me a comment below or sending me an email to firstname.lastname@example.org
You can also sign up for my email newsletter if you want to know when I add a post or that self-care printable. You will automatically receive an email notification once I add something here. Don’t worry, I will not bombard your inbox. At most right now, there will likely be one update a week.
With much love,